Would you call a girl if she ‘put out’ on the first date?

Charlie I think that you are spot on with your previous response about the two-to three day window before calling after your first date. I rarely appreciate a call back the next day in the general sense. However, ironically, if you happen to ‘sleep over’ after that fateful night you previously described in a bar, then women really crave some contact. Perhaps this is mainly to dispel the worry we have that it was just all about the booty call, and they are not ‘into’ us – perhaps it’s because we are a bit emotionally committed.

Thus, girls the age old rule, you can’t put out. You just can’t.

I have been in this position. You agonize, watching the phone, try tuning it off; even calling it to make sure it is still working. And still it doesn’t ring… Conversely I have also had long term partners whom I slept with on the first date.

Answer this for me Chucky, would you call a girl back if she put out on the first date?

The aforementioned question receives a great deal of discussion from my girlfriends.

A matter of interest

I believe that the probability of a guy calling you boils down to a matter of interest. If  he really likes you (preferably one you haven’t met in a nightclub or pub) he’ll generally call when he says he will. If he doesn’t, then it’s a pretty good measurement of how interested he is. As Greg Behrendt’s book goes… maybe He’s Just Not That Into You?

Secondly, I’m of the belief that meeting the opposite sex in a bar spells trouble, because you’re usually dealing with someone on the hunt for a shag

We are just as baffled as you.

We are just as baffled as you.

I know Charlie, easy for me to say, as I sit here with a uterus, but although I understand your quandary, it is very much the same argument for women. What do you want?!

Between a rock and a hard place…

After having numerous conversations with male friends and listening into female discussions about what makes a man attractive, something occurred to me.

The male species is caught between a rock and a very hard place.

Not so long ago, the role of the man and woman was clearly defined. The guy was the bread winner and the woman looked after the household. Thankfully the world is now a place where a woman has the opportunity to earn as much as, or far more than a man. The days are gone of needing a man to support her. Now, while I personally find career minded women very attractive, it has left guys asking some questions…

Do women no longer need us and what makes a man a man?

Meet Immy

I’m your regular 25 year-old single girl, with regular tastes, insecurities and hang ups about men.

I date. Some may say I date a lot.

I am good at dating. I know that because I can go to dinner (take last Thursday for example), talk to a man for anywhere up to four hours, listen to his mundane stories about his mundane job and even laugh at his mundane jokes. I then get the text message the next day, “So I have not heard from you. What happened? I thought we had an awesome time.” Don’t get me wrong, I often act like a guy would in many cases. Actually come to think of it, I was the guy last Thursday.

So here I am trying a new approach.

Meet Charlie

Argh the dating game!

I’ve certainly had my share of ups and downs. Possibly more downs than ups but who’s counting anyway? I’ve had some pretty intense relationships along the way but nothing that’s lasted more than two-and-a-half years and generally with girls who live in far off countries. You kind of make things hard for yourself when you fall in love with a Norwegian who wants to stay in Norway while you desperately want to come back to the white sandy beaches of Australia! And long distance relationships. You can forget them! Absence may make the heart grow fonder but if you can’t reach out and physically touch someone, well, what’s the point?

So, what do I look for in a woman? I suppose I’d be a bold face liar if I said that physical attraction doesn’t count for anything. I’m not out searching for a super model but I do like a woman who takes care of herself. I am extremely attracted to independent, career-minded women who have their own goals and ambitions. However, over and above everything I love girls that smile all the time and have a kind heart. These two things for me are really powerful aphrodisiacs.

I’ve spent the last nine years overseas and I must admit that it’s tougher than I thought it would be to meet girls in Sydney. I’m starting to get pretty sick and tired of meeting or trying to meet women in pubs and nightclubs. It’s just too impersonal and in my experience it has never led anything meaningful. Not just that but you set yourself up for some positively brutal knock backs.

So, that then begs the question, where does one meet girls if you’re a single guy?